Damascus experience

So I talked about changing direction in an earlier post and how this year was a major year for me.  In the post I talk about having a “Damascus” experience — yet another biblical reference — been so full of those lately.  But my use of the expression was really to capture the life changing aspect of the experience I have had this year.

I have been struggling with grief and depression for a while.  It’s been nearly three years of being in this deep dark hole.  You know the kind where you sit in a corner, knees to your chest, and wait it out because there’s just nowhere to go except to sit in the muck of sadness.  I swear I cried so much in the shower, wailed for God to help me, and called upon every ounce of will power in order to make it through the last year.

But earlier in the year I also realized that I needed to get better.  I kept looking for a solution. I wanted to try anti-depression pills but got spooked out the first time I took a dose.  I continued with talk therapy but I wasn’t really getting through.  We tried this technique with my therapist and it was a success.  I was able to get to the root of my immediate issues and I am not sure how it all works… all I know is that I have relief.  It’s been a process of peeling back the layers and dealing with the surprises that I find.  Now, the burden of sadness that plagued me everyday, making it hard to do even the littlest of things, is loosening its grip on me.  I feel like I can breath.

It was tough dealing with depression and for such a long time.  I can do the moods and the depressive episodes — I know that we are not promised all sunny, freaking-hippy-happy days.  I can do the ups and downs like everyone else… I just couldn’t do the every day of it.  It was draining and it was like this secret I kept inside… not because I was keeping things secret but because depression is isolating.

The breakthrough with the treatment has been slow but steady.  I definitely knew something had changed but it wasn’t until a few weeks after the treatment that I realized how badly I had been doing.  I can only describe it as waking up the morning after a whole night of storms and walking through the damage.  I didn’t realize how much my writing had suffered.  I had neglected my physical health too — my quality of sleep was bad, no exercise, wild food binges — and well, I was just not happy.

As I am getting better, I am also realizing how much work has to go into reclaiming the time… the reflection, the focus back on my physical health, writing, and staying healthy. The change in direction for me is about this effort and it extends to about what I write, how I share myself, and experience life in general.

 

Channeling the happy thoughts

Today was a rough day for me.  I was basically okay but had a case of melancholia.  I was very happy when my nap on the couch went by slowly and time didn’t zip through as it usually does. I woke up from my nap without a panic or anxiety so that was great! But I couldn’t explain this sunken feeling.

When I have the blues, if I can explain the source, I am more likely to ride the wave faster.  But I couldn’t pin this one down.

Usually, it is part longing for someone to be with me on lazy Sunday afternoon.  Part of it is loneliness and the tension of walking a space where I desire the alone time too.  Part of it is despair because I can’t figure our fast enough what I want.  Part of it is wondering if this is all that life has to offer.  Part of it is playing victim, part of it is fatigue, part of it is the neurotic brain, and part of it is… just exhausting.

And even after all that, I couldn’t understand why I had this feeling of emotional distress. I couldn’t journal it away. I couldn’t screen it away – you know, watch enough Netflix episodes of a show and put myself in a catatonic state. I tried a couple of empowering thoughts.  A half-ass attempt at meditation.  I tried to get into a quick HIIT workout.  But then there not enough that I could do.

And so I gave in to the sadness and waited for it to seep out of my pores.

It was a long day.